HBO Real Time Returns Friday, July 30, 2021

ERIC ADAMS JOSHUA GREEN - REP. STACEY PLASKETT

Friday, July 30, 2021 at 10 pm
Watch on HBO and HBO Max
Visit HBO Real Time

Schedule

BILL MAHER COMEDY TOUR

July 31, 2021
Sat • 8 pm
Helen Devitt Jones Theater
Lubbock, TX
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August 1, 2021
Sun • 8 pm
ACL Live at the Moody Theatre
Austin, TX
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August 14, 2021
Sat • 8 pm
Riverside Theatre
Milwaukee, WI
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August 15, 2021
Sun • 8 pm
Ryman Auditorium
Nashville, TN
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September 5, 2021
Sun • 8 pm
Silver Legacy Resort Casino
Reno, Nevada
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View More Scheduled Dates
“Sarah Palin has strong opinions on the Libyans. She said marriage is between a man and a woman and Libyans like Rachel Maddow are what is ruining this country.”

- Bill Maher -

“It’s amazing, the world now has more oil than it has places to store it. Even Don Jr.’s hair is at capacity.”

- Bill Maher -

“We fear different things. I fear climate change. They fear a demon in a red bodysuit… with a pitchfork.”

- Bill Maher -

“Over half of Republicans believe in Creationism – for those too young to recall, they didn’t used to be the party of ignorance-what happened?”

- Bill Maher -

“We have the Bill of Rights. What we need is a Bill of Responsibilities.”

- Bill Maher -

“If you think you have it tough, read history books.”

- Bill Maher -

“What do you think would happen if tomorrow Obama showed up with Kanye’s crop circles shaved into his head? Stock market would lose 5,000 pts.”

- Bill Maher -

“It is being reported that a third of the world watched the royal wedding – and yet they claim gays are only 3 pct of population?”

- Bill Maher -

“I believe in the death penalty, but with better DNA testing – my slogan is ‘Let’s Kill The right People'”

- Bill Maher -

“The battle for good health is won on the cellular level”

- Bill Maher -

“”Ha, we’re changing Operation Iraqi Freedom to Operation New Dawn – sounds like a Twilight movie – we’re not occupiers, we’re sexy vampires!”

- Bill Maher -

“Wow just read Oxford Dictionary added OMG and LOL as words! WTF??”

- Bill Maher -

“There’s a reason small towns are small. No one wants to live there.”

- Bill Maher -

“The irony is what we love most about our cars—the feeling of freedom they provide—has made us slaves. Slaves to cheap oil, which has corrupted our politics, threatened our environment and funded our enemies.”

- Bill Maher -

“Jim Bakker spells his name with two k’s because three would be too obvious.”

- Bill Maher -

“Is it just me or does Times Square look like Tokyo now?”

- Bill Maher -

“If you don’t know how to feel about the arrest of Julian Assange here’s the rule in Trumpworld: Hiding in an embassy? Bad if you have secrets. Chopping someone up in an embassy? Good if you have oil.”

- Bill Maher -

“Women cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them.”

- Bill Maher -

“The Real Axis of Evil in America is the Genius of our marketing and the gullibility of our people”

- Bill Maher -

“It seems like we have to tax something, why not rich dead people? Of all the things you could tax; they don’t have any need for the money, on account of that whole being dead thing.”

- Bill Maher -