“Religion is dangerous because it allows human beings who don’t have all the answers to think that they do.”
“Over half of Republicans believe in Creationism – for those too young to recall, they didn’t used to be the party of ignorance-what happened?”
“Isn’t the problem that almost all Republicans are conservative, but not all Democrats are liberal?”
“We fear different things. I fear climate change. They fear a demon in a red bodysuit… with a pitchfork.”
“The Bible looks like it started out as a game of Mad Libs.”
“The Real Axis of Evil in America is the Genius of our marketing and the gullibility of our people”
“The problem is that the people with the most ridiculous ideas are always the people who are most certain of them.”
“Women cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them.”
All religion is just an opinion.
“Suicide is man’s way of telling God, ‘You can’t fire me – I quit.'”
“If you have a gun, you can rob a bank, but if you have a bank, you can rob everyone.”
“Men are only as loyal as their options.”
“”Ha, we’re changing Operation Iraqi Freedom to Operation New Dawn – sounds like a Twilight movie – we’re not occupiers, we’re sexy vampires!”
“If you don’t know how to feel about the arrest of Julian Assange here’s the rule in Trumpworld: Hiding in an embassy? Bad if you have secrets. Chopping someone up in an embassy? Good if you have oil.”
“There was a revolution in the Arab country of Tunisia. Not a lot of people know about Tunisia. Sarah Palin thinks it’s the name of one of Obama’s kids”
“Wow just read Oxford Dictionary added OMG and LOL as words! WTF??”
“The battle for good health is won on the cellular level”
“I believe in the death penalty, but with better DNA testing – my slogan is ‘Let’s Kill The right People'”
“Is it just me or does Times Square look like Tokyo now?”
“Men are only as loyal as their options.”
HEADLINES
October 30, 2026
HBO Real Time Guests Oct. 30, 2026
October 23, 2026
HBO Real Time Guests Oct. 23, 2026
October 9, 2026
HBO Real Time Guests Oct. 9, 2026
October 2, 2026
HBO Real Time Guests Oct. 2, 2026
September 25, 2026
HBO Real Time Guests Sept. 25, 2026
September 18, 2026
HBO Real Time Guests Sept. 18, 2026
September 11, 2026
HBO Real Time Guests Sept. 11, 2026
August 28, 2026
HBO Real Time Guests Aug. 28, 2026
August 21, 2026
HBO Real Time Guests Aug. 21, 2026
August 14, 2026
HBO Real Time Guests Aug. 14, 2026
VIDEOS
Moocher Nation | Real Time with Bill Maher (HBO)
Now that socialism is having a moment, we have to get real about how much of it we have, how much of it we need, and how much of it we can afford.
Overtime with Bill Maher: Gov. Andy Beshear, Steve Hilton
Bill and his Real Time guests – Kentucky Gov. Andy Beshear and California gubernatorial candidate Steve Hilton – continue their conversation after the show.
Justine Bateman | Club Random with Bill Maher
Greek Out | Real Time with Bill Maher (HBO)
Human nature is bad – and the best we can do is create institutions that don’t make it so easy to be worse.
Overtime with Bill Maher: Sen. Thom Tillis, Sara Eisen (HBO)
Bill and his Real Time guests continue their conversation after the show.
Michael Douglas | Club Random with Bill Maher
Ari Emanuel | Club Random with Bill Maher
Generation TMZ | Real Time with Bill Maher (HBO)
It’s disturbing how much Americans now enjoy watching other people be less than perfect. Want to make America a better place? Put the phone down, live your life, and stop looking to ruin someone else’s.
Overtime with Bill Maher: Malcolm Gladwell, Fareed Zakaria, Anand Giridharadas (HBO)
Bill and his Real Time guests continue their conversation after the show.
Howie Mandel | Club Random with Bill Maher