“Tea baggers. The one thing they hate is when you call them racist. The other thing they hate is black people.”
- Bill Maher -
“It is being reported that a third of the world watched the royal wedding – and yet they claim gays are only 3 pct of population?”
- Bill Maher -
“Isn’t the problem that almost all Republicans are conservative, but not all Democrats are liberal?”
- Bill Maher -
“Men are only as loyal as their options.”
- Bill Maher -
“Why are decent citizens still being jailed for smoking the wrong plant, easing the suffering of the terminally ill, or accepting cash for sex instead of the customary dinner and drinks?”
- Bill Maher -
“There’s a reason small towns are small. No one wants to live there.”
- Bill Maher -
“God isn’t talking to you, those are called thoughts.”
- Bill Maher -
“There are good people who do good things, there are bad people who do bad things, but to get a good person to do a bad thing takes religion.”
- Bill Maher -
“Religion is dangerous because it allows human beings who don’t have all the answers to think that they do.”
- Bill Maher -
“Is it just me or does Times Square look like Tokyo now?”
- Bill Maher -
“The plain fact is: religion must die for mankind to live.”
- Bill Maher -
“It’s amazing, the world now has more oil than it has places to store it. Even Don Jr.’s hair is at capacity.”
- Bill Maher -
“Suicide is man’s way of telling God, ‘You can’t fire me – I quit.'”
- Bill Maher -
“We have the Bill of Rights. What we need is a Bill of Responsibilities.”
- Bill Maher -
“The battle for good health is won on the cellular level”
- Bill Maher -
“Don’t you miss the days when America was just MORALLY bankrupt?”
- Bill Maher -
“The Real Axis of Evil in America is the Genius of our marketing and the gullibility of our people”
- Bill Maher -
“Women cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them.”
- Bill Maher -
“Why do people act shocked whenever NASCAR drivers get into an accident what?! No! One minute he’s flying around an oil-slicked track at 200 mph, and the next minute: gone!”
- Bill Maher -
“To really understand how whack religion is, you have to look at the new religions– which for this country is Mormons and Scientologists. Who I think should merge and make Mormontology.”
- Bill Maher -